Worst tim burton movies12/23/2023 ![]() ![]() Jack Skellington’s moronic scheme has no legitimate chance of succeeding. But alas, gorgeous visuals and catchy tunes notwithstanding, the film is 66 minutes of a delusional psychopath whose stupid plan goes stupidly. Each time I’ve watched this film, since October of 1993, I kept hoping this would be the time I fell under its spell. Yes, yes, I know the stories, and I know the rhymes too. Moreover, the film positions Green's aggressive and strong-willed villain with Depp’s (much younger) reclusive and “comely” love interest (Bella Heathcoate) as the biggest example of “virgin/whore” dynamics this side of The Town.ġ6. The film villainizes Eva Green’s bewitching business tycoon while lionizing Johnny Depp’s bloodthirsty revived vampire as the rightful heir to the family business. But after an intriguing “Tim Burton movie set in the real world” beginning, the film plays like a soap opera, complete with copious scenes of characters standing around explaining the plot. ![]() The cast has a hoot in this adaptation of the classic vampire soap opera, and I love that the vast majority of main characters (played by Eva Green, Michelle Pfeiffer and Chloe Moretz among others) are women. And the film does little to entertain until she finally engages in a J.R.R. No, the problem is a story in which Alice (Mia Wasikowska) flees to “Underland” to escape from her preordained destiny only to spend the rest of the film being told by her fantastical friends that she must fulfill a “kill the monster” destiny. The core problem isn’t the cast (Johnny Depp is fine, folks) or the effects work (although the 3D did it no favors). ![]() While I love the fact that Walt Disney lets screenwriter Linda Woolverton pen righteously angry feminist fables with blockbuster budgets, this one strikes out. I wish I could say that this critically derided mega-hit has improved with time. ![]()
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